Anderson Silva: 'I don't want to feel that pain ever again'
- USA TODAY Sports - Anderson Silva is still haunted by the pain of his 2013 leg injury. (Jayne Kamin-Oncea-USA TODAY Sports)
For most of Anderson Silva's career, the fighter's supreme confidence in himself seemed to be perhaps his most important tool. For nearly a decade, most of his opponents appeared to battle a great deal of fear and doubt when facing him, in addition to his punches, kicks, knees and submission holds.
Now, as he prepares for a return fight following his gruesome leg injury in Dec. of 2013, "The Spider" is the one who lacks full confidence and has to come to terms with a very particular type of fear. The Brazilian legend is currently in training to prepare for his scheduled bout against Nick Diaz this coming Feb.
His doctors say that he's getting stronger, physically, but admitted earlier this summer that Silva is still scared to throw kicks with his once-injured leg. In a recent interview Silva himself acknowledged his mental struggle.
"I feel no pain at all," Silva began, according to a translation from Guilherme Cruz.
"My strength is back because I’m back to training. The hardest part is self-confidence, to kick again as I used to."
Understandably, Silva says he's haunted by ghosts of the pain he felt when Chris Weidman broke his leg in half. "Fear is natural...I don’t want to feel that pain ever again. No way," he said.
Silva said he's worked with a psychologist to help him prepare to fight again. "I’ve worked with a psychologist so I can get rid of the ghosts of those horrible moments of that fight, when I had that accident," he said.
"I’m a little apprehensive in training. I know I can execute the movement, but I end up not doing it for fear."
Anderson Silva is one of the best fighters, perhaps the best, in MMA history. That greatness has pushed him to come back quickly from what very easily could have been a career-ending injury.
However, it's clear that the Muay Thai specialist is battling his own mind more than anything, at this point. Silva was once comfortable, at home, in the ring and cage and while weilding his full aresenal of weapons.
Now, he's doing everything he can to find that comfort zone again, including going back home. Silva and his family live in Los Angeles, but the long-time middleweight king says he's training in Brazil for his fight against Diaz.
The reason? It just feels better.
"I feel better training in Brazil," he explained.
"And, so I can be at my 100 percent to return to fighting, I’d rather train in Brazil."
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